It took us many years, but it was only this year that we started to look more in depth into realistic tools. Previously we had information that they were in significant decline, but surprisingly there is renewed interest in them, so we started testing and reviewing them more. And from our best already read reviews we’ve picked the 5 best dildos that look like a real man’s penis. And we will regularly update this ranking according to the latest reviews in our magazine.
How did we choose these most popular real dildos/penises for the year 2024?
Primarily, we were (unexpectedly) interested in the reality of the dildo. If it is really identical or at least similar to a erect penis with testicles. Thus, we evaluated color, size, touching sensation, firmness of “erection”, and several other values (see bullet list below). From that, we came up with “only” these 5 cool pieces. So, they may be few in number, which may just be our subjective feeling, but the feeling of a real man in your lap (or butt) can definitely stand up – and fill you up.
We explored, for example, how distinct the glans with the bridle is, whether there is a noticeable hole in it, how the testicles are connected to the body of the penis, what the artificial balls actually feel like, what the veins on the body of the penis feel like, … it was a very thorough and slightly perverse job… but we love it!
What we rated:
- materials (how it feels, healthiness, cleaning, …),
- workmanship (everything fits as it should, fine surface without flaws, …),
- realism (really looks like a live penis with testicles, …),
- suction (it is not realistic, but it fantastically increases the usability of the diddle, …),
- size (has penis, glans, testicles of the right proportions, you’ll have a good time, …),
- price (not crucial but included in our evaluation matrix, …),
- and fun (or key element = whether the toy makes us enjoy sex with multiple uses).
Why trust our comparative rankings?
Table of the 5 best realistic dildos from our reviews
We’ve been testing erotic toys for over 8 years and have had over 300 of them pass through our hands (not just). That’s a solid number for various comparisons, a bunch of experience in sex and finding the best pieces. Or are we spoiled and not everything will excite us like at the beginning. So you can trust our reviews – we’re experienced testers (and testers too) and we won’t recommend anything we’re not really happy with.
|Where to buy
|Maxim with suction cup and testicles
|Silicone soft surface, great length, pronounced glans and testicles and this with a very strong suction cup.
|A cast of the penis Roberta Rosenberga
|Extremely large, but fantastic in action thanks to the double density - softer on the outside, firmer inside = like the real Robert.
|M size silicone dildo with veins
|Distinctive veins, silicone matte surface (nice) and strong suction cup - a clear representative of the best real dildos with us.
|King Cock realistic strapon
|A strapon that has but a removable realistic beautiful dildo. It has no testicles but a well-drawn glans and fine veins.
|Basic Dildo with Testicles
|Simple, smoother and less detailed but with a functional suction cup this is the perfect basic dildo for anyone.
Just by the name it’s clear that this dildo won’t be tiny – but then again, we can have men with small penises anytime we want. But it’s worse with a bigger one (penis, not ego). That’s where this Maxim comes in. He always holds, stands, doesn’t bullshit and enjoys his job. It’ll hold you up in the bathroom thanks to the extremely strong suction cup, but also lying down in bed. We appreciate the realistic vein pattern and the more pronounced glans, which you can feel when you rub it inside yourself. Sized for the vagina, more inquisitive and sensually relaxed women (or perhaps men) can handle it in the ass.
We also like the matte surface of the silicone, which is very pleasant to the touch (it sort of scrubs lightly between your fingers like the real thing) and at the same time hypoallergenic and non-harmful. We don’t know much to complain about. It’s simply a MAXIMAL piece that belongs in every toy collection.
This was the piece that definitely brought us to our knees. A realistic cast of Czech porn actor Robert Rosenberg’s BIG penis. Until you see it in person, you won’t believe that this is definitely no pet or pidgeon. It’s a solid cannon that is fantastically rendered (it is, after all, a 100% cast).
What we extremely like about it is the use of “double” silicone with different densities. It’s softer on the outside, but the inside is a denser version and it gives an incredibly realistic feel overall. This cat isn’t #1 in our ranking jonly because of its size, which (so far) not everyone can handle. But more experienced and inquisitive women can handle it!
The king of mid-range real penises – well, for our editorial staff, because they had a lot of fun with it. It’s a realistic M-sized dildo (or 18cm in length) with pronounced veining and a very soft surface. If you closed your eyes, and warmed it up a bit, you’d have trouble telling the living from the “inanimate”.
We appreciate the pleasing shaping, distinctive glans and the versatile suction cup, which will make it noticeably lighter. It’ll attach the dildo to the fridge, mirror, or for us (our TIP) to the bathroom tiles. Either on the floor and you can freely roll on the “poop” or on the wall, where you enjoy sex from behind and fully control the angle, speed and especially the depth of the thrusts.
It’s a captivating sensation when no one is interfering and everything is exactly as you need it… circle your nipples with your free fingers, or ride your lap on a spanking… success is guaranteed and tested in front of you… Many times 🙂 And we’re not ashamed of it.
While it’s basically a strapon, or strap-on dildo for fucking your girlfriend (in the lap or ass) or your inquisitive partner (in the ass), we couldn’t forgive its inclusion in this ranking. Because the King Cock (or “King of Dicks”) is truly a beautifully shaped penis you shouldn’t miss.
It doesn’t have testicles, but not all women require those in dildos of this type, so it doesn’t matter. We like the detail of the penis surface, which has fine veins on it like a real penis, and also the shaping of the glans, which is more pronounced than the body – so you can feel it when you insert it. And if you don’t enjoy it as a dildo (and believe me, that’s not just going to happen), you can put it in the included harness and… give somebody a real hard time from the other side…
Simple, purposeful and still realistic – that’s this basic dildo with suction cup and testicles for us. Material-wise, it’s closer to gel than silicone, so expect a slightly sticky feel. But you won’t even notice that when lubing up, and it’s a good companion for beginner lapping.
You’ll feel bigger testicles on impact, so you’ll also enjoy more realistic sex alone. It’s sized for either the lap or the ass. On average, it would be enough for basic deep oral sex training… but I trust that as readers of Lascivní.cz you can handle it with your left butt.
Why did we put these pieces in the dildos list?
Real dildos or shall we say fake penises are a very traditional category of erotic aids. Perhaps some of the oldest, because what would you simply imitate and use it for sex? Well, an erect penis! So that’s really where it might have started – although back then it was wooden or bone pieces, today it’s more advanced silicones or hi-class gels and TPR/TPE materials. But I guess more hasn’t changed – there is still a lot of emphasis on realism = similarity to a real penis.
Real porn star penis casts!
It’s no secret that almost all dildos are cast from a real man’s penis. Whether it’s from some anonymous and interestingly endowed man (no one cares about the average), or a straight up male porn star.
The Czech Republic was spared this until the advent of Robert Rosenberg’s penis casting, but real gay porn actors are very popular worldwide:
e.g. Alam Wernik, Diego Sans, Allen King, Brent Corrigan, Jake Bass, Pierre Fitch, Carter Dane, Boomer Banks, Levi Karter, …
or classic straight adult film stars
e.g. John Holmes, Dick Rambone, Kevin Dean, Black Thunder, Mr. Marcus, Jeff Stryker, Jason Luv, Adam Dexter, Tom of Finland, Bam, Tyler Knight, Dominic Pacifico, Steven Daigle, Shane Diesel…
FleshJack Leads the World
Playing a big role in this market is the brand FleshJack – a subsidiary of the famous Fleshlight, which has made a name for itself in a similar vein = realistic artificial vaginas (even from the world’s pornstars – it’s an honor to be cast by this brand).
Of course, with these very realistic dildos, you almost always pay for the name of its original “wearer” – but for porn lovers and above average “dicks” this won’t be a problem.
And that’s the end of our new comparative review and ranking of the most realistic dildos on the Czech market for today. We hope that you will choose from our selection or other sub-reviews and find the right piece for your intimate play.